As a leader, you know that success hinges not just on strategy, but on the capacity of your team to adapt, innovate, and persevere. But have you ever considered the silent driver behind these traits? It’s the language your team uses every single day, particularly what I call Boundary Words.

In the world of professional communication, these little words define the boundaries of what a person believes is possible. By tuning into this internal lexicon, managers gain an accessible, yet deeply powerful, tool for fostering a growth mindset and driving organizational transformation.

The Trap of Compulsion: The Fixed Mindset

We frequently hear, or use ourselves, the Language of Necessity. These are the demanding words: “must,” “have to,” “need to,” and “should“.

When a team member frames their actions using this language, they are describing a universe where they feel compelled by an external agent or force. This perspective is inherently restrictive. It communicates that their effort is driven by obligation rather than intention.

Speaking from experience, operating from a place defined by “need to” or “have to” is “not a particularly fun place to operate from”. This feeling of external constraint locks individuals into a fixed mindset, limiting their ability to see new pathways because they are too focused on the pressure of the mandate.

The Gateway to Growth: The Language of Choice and Possibility

Now, consider the profound difference when we shift to the Language of Choice and Possibility. This vocabulary includes empowering terms like “can,” “may,” “able to,” and crucially, “choose to” or “want to“.

This language immediately results in experiencing more freedom and possibility. It anchors the belief that the individual possesses the capacity to respond and that their action is driven by their own internal selection, not external coercion. This shift transforms actions from compulsions into genuine choices, which is “much more fun”.

Indeed, holding the powerful belief that “you can learn almost anything” fundamentally reshapes one’s capabilities.

Coaching Your Team: Fostering Resilience, Creativity, and Innovation

As a manager, you have the opportunity to actively coach your team toward this language of possibility, directly boosting their performance, resilience, and capacity for innovation.

1. Raise Linguistic Awareness

The first step is awareness. Leaders should practice sensory acuity—the art of watching and listening closely—to detect patterns in language.

Action Tip for Leaders: When an employee expresses a blockage or constraint using necessity language (“I have to finish this report, but I can’t start the new project”), gently echo their concern and then ask simple reframing questions: “I hear that you feel you must finish X. What do you choose to focus on first to ensure the best results?” This simple redirection highlights the choice they always possess.

2. Building Resilience Through Choice

Resilience is built when individuals own their struggles and successes. When a person shifts from feeling “I have to solve this problem” (necessity) to “I choose to tackle this problem” (possibility), the struggle becomes purposeful.

Action Tip for Leaders: Help staff re-pattern their internal dialogue. Encourage them to replace phrases like “I need to practice this skill” with “I choose to practice this skill because I want the professional growth that follows”. This deliberate technique, which moves them from necessity to possibility, is a powerful and positive driver of internal motivation and enjoyment.

3. Fueling Creativity and Innovation

Innovation requires stepping outside established limits, embracing the belief that we are capable of “far, far more than you think you are”. Necessity language instantly kills this exploration.

Action Tip for Leaders:

• Frame Outcomes with Possibility: When setting goals, use Possibility Language to open thinking. Instead of saying, “We must hit these Q3 targets,” try, “We can exceed these targets by exploring three new client engagement strategies.”

• Use Forward-Thinking Language: Use phrases that presuppose positive, inevitable outcomes, giving your team member something resourceful to aim for. For instance: “As you continue to investigate these new product designs, you may already be aware of the creative solutions emerging this week…”

• Soft Questioning: Rather than challenging their thinking directly, adopt a posture of “just wondering” or curiosity. Ask: “I was wondering, if we were free to invent a completely different solution, what possibilities would emerge?”

By consciously monitoring and adjusting the fundamental “Boundary Words” used in daily conversation, leaders empower their teams to dismantle self-imposed limitations and approach challenges with genuine engagement, paving the way for inevitable success